On Wearing a Marriage

This is the last part of a speech to the Bride and Groom that I gave at the wonderful wedding of my youngest daughter, this past June 14^th.

                                                                              ~

… A few days ago, our newest son-in-law asked if, for his instruction, I would "make a list of the 10 things that make a good marriage."

I was a little tired that day, and so I’m afraid I disappointed him.

I said: “I’m beat, and I’m not good at lists anyway. But if I can say one thing for sure, it would be this: if you pursue goodness, truth, and beauty, all the days of your life together, I am pretty certain the other nine things will follow.”

Then, I started thinking about how beautiful my daughter was going to be in the lovely Chantilly-lace wedding gown she wears tonight. It is the very same wedding dress worn by her Grandmother over 55 years ago, and by my own wife almost 30 years ago.  

And that started me thinking about what it means to wear a successful marriage.

Because when you think about it, a beautiful marriage, like a beautiful dress, doesn’t just appear. It is a thing that must be carefully made.

It is made, first of all, from the whole cloth of the couple’s hopes and dreams. From their deep commitment to carefully shape a beautiful union such as we have witnessed today.

From this will spring spontaneously the many acts of kindness, of giving, to each other, and to others, that will keep them aiming at this common purpose. They will be acts that wind, like the threads that bind, through all of their life together – visible here, invisible there - but all the while strengthening and shaping the two into the one beautiful thing they wanted to make from the start.

A marriage thus well-made will surely endure, because, like the well-made dress, it will be always supple, ready to bend gently with the forces surrounding, without tearing, or losing its special form.

So in the end, just as the dress gives such joy to the bride who wears it, to we who see her so happy in it, and to the groom who gazes upon her (with that special kind of wonder we see in his eyes right now), a marriage lived well, and beautifully, is a sight to behold at any age.

But this is especially so for the young, who watch it forming, as if by itself, over the years; watch it turn, fold, and move in its own particular and unique way, in the light, and the winds, and the shadows of life … so that they long one day to wear a marriage just like that!

ladies and gentlemen - please lift your glasses, and join me in wishing our new Bride and Groom the happiest possible marriage.”

Comments

[Larry]

Congratualtions for the new bride and groom-best to you both!!. In my family theirs mostly long and successful good marriages. NOTE:bought the new book-Oh,Oh,Canada just picked it up today most seemingly seems like a interesting,informative and good read.Theirs a buzz going around concerning this book now.